Guarding the Heart

I tend to finish what I start, yet I just stopped reading a 688 page book on page 227.  I realized that my customary good spirits were waning, and I connected that to reading this award-winning novel each night. The talented writer renders a complicated context in which each character lives and recreates the oppressive conditions of its setting in the reader. However, I cannot absorb a couple hundred pages of violence and the worst in human kind with impunity.

There’s a spiritual concept called “guarding the heart” and “guarding the eyes” that comes from the desert fathers and mothers. While I’m not oblivious to the mayhem in this world—headlines of heartbreak and outrage come steadily into awareness-- I do watch where I put my attention during discretionary time. 

 Just as I don’t pay for movies that scare me or go on amusement rides that turn me upside down, I use my free time to seek out kindness, wonder and the kinds of connections often called “heartwarming.” I guess that’s why I’m so drawn to the concept of leaning into the light.

 I can appreciate the accomplishment of this massive book and be grateful for the privilege of setting it aside.